OUR STAFF

If you were a plant, what kind of plant would you be?
A ruby ball cactus
What is the weirdest thing you do in your free time?
Make low-quality beats on GarageBand
Where is the weirdest place you spent a Saturday night in high school?
In a crowded horse barn at 1 a.m.
Logan
Arnold
Lead Copy Editor

Ben
Brock
If you were a fictional character who would you be?
Flat Stanley
If you could tell time with any object, what would it be?
A sundial - I have no idea how those things work
If you could eliminate any color, which would it be and why?
Indigo - There's nothing worse than when you go to color the sky of your kindergarten drawing only to find out the crayon masquerading as blue was actually a weird shade of purple
Content Editor

What is your favorite arbitrary fact?
In Switzerland, it is illegal to own only one guinea pig. you have to at least own two. they consider it cruel to not let guinea pigs socialize.
What is the weirdest thing you do in your free time?
Collect sauces from various restaurants.
Where is the weirdest place you spent a Saturday night in high school?
In a hotel room while hugging a Book of Mormon.
Gatlin
Freiburger
Associate Editor

Grace
Georgi
If you were a fictional character, who would you be?
Clifford the Big Red Dog. No thoughts, just big :]
What is the weirdest thing you do in your free time?
I still play Webkinz when I get stressed (there's no problem that the pizza game cannot solve).
What would your band name be?
Dumb People Rights
Associate Editor

Parker
Gray
If you were a fictional character, who would you be?
Edna Mode. Cool house. Great hair.
What philosophical concept frustrates you the most?
Anything involving numbers. I didn't sign up for that.
What would be your death row meal?
Fried Chicken and whatever food cost the government the most money to procure.
Associate Editor

Griffin
Green
What is your favorite arbitrary fact?
On average, a country somewhere in the world celebrates its independence from Britain roughly once a week.
If you were a plant, what kind of plant would you be?
An Evergreen tree, I like being tall
What would be your death row meal?
A nice Mac-and-Cheese
Content Editor

Emma
Hamilton
What is the weirdest thing you do in your free time?
I like to do online apartment/job hunting in cities I want to live in. Lately, it's been Portland, Maine.
If you could tell time with any object, what would you choose?
My security water bottle.
If you were a plant, what kind of plant would you be?
A cactus. I'm pretty self-sufficient, and sometimes I forget to drink water for 3 days straight.
Editor-in-Chief

Rachel
Johnson
If you were a plant, what kind of plant would you be?
Mint because it's outrageous and grows everywhere.
If you could tell time with any object, what would you choose?
A doorknob so it can tell me how late I am.
If you could be a fly on the wall in any room, what room would you be in?
The room where my brother was trying to convince my sister in law to name their first son after Bruce Wayne.
Associate Editor

What is your favorite arbitrary fact?
Some jellyfish can age forwards, and then age backwards, becoming essentially immortals
If you were a plant, what kind of plant would you be?
A Paw Paw tree! Because they produce fruit that is a mix between a banana and a mango, but they are found in Indiana and Michigan, where you would never think to look.
What would be your death row meal?
Toast
Karina
Kasmauskis
Design Team

What is your favorite arbitrary fact?
Humans have the same number of bones in their necks as giraffes do.
What would your band name be?
Strong, Independent, and Hungry
If you could tell time with any object, what would you choose?
I’d like to be able to tap the side of my glasses and have the time pop up in my field of vision. They’re always with me and I wouldn’t have to look somewhere else to see the time.
Meghan Kirkpatrick

Brianna
Lopez
Where is the weirdest place you spent a Saturday night in high school?
The Gaylord Opryland Resort & Convention Center (it was also definitely the coolest place I spent a Saturday night in high school)
What philosophical concept frustrates you the most?
Existentialism because it makes my head hurt
If you could eliminate any color, which would it be and why?
Puce - It's not even a bad color it just has a terrible name
Associate Editor
Copy Editor

Isabel
Lozano
If you were a fictional character, who would you be?
Ironman.
What is the weirdest thing you do in your free time?
Collect rocks.
What would be your death row meal?
ANYTHING with potatoes.
Content Editor

What is your favorite arbitrary fact?
Cavendish bananas (the regular grocery store banana) are all genetically identical and come from banana plants cloned since the 1950s.
What things are most commonly found in your pockets?
My coat pockets feature things like: random receipts, random things I’ve decided are lucky, my keys, and sometimes candy. My pants pockets hold my phone and nothing else because they are small girl pockets.
If you could eliminate any color, which would you choose and why?
I really hate medium green. Blue-green and yellow-green are fine, but medium green is just the worst.
Melanie
Miller
Content Editor

Jozie
Nicholson
If you were a plant, what kind of plant would you be?
I would be a fake plant, so no one has to water me and I'd still look cute.
If you could tell time with any object, what would you choose?
Sunflowers, so I have a reason to plant sunflowers everywhere.
If you could eliminate any color, which would you choose and why?
Any shade of blue/purple that is not clearly one or the other. They are just so frustrating.
Content Editor

If you were a plant, what kind of plant would you be?
A white pine on a hillside, overlooking a hidden lake.
If you could be a fly on the wall in any room, what room would you be in?
Gordon Ramsey’s Kitchen
What would be your death row meal?
Chicken parmesan on a bed of noodles with green beans and Sister Schubert rolls.
Isaac
Reinoehl
Design Team Lead

If you were a type of plant, what would you be?
Bamboo (I want to be eaten by Pandas)
Favorite fictional character?
Babe, the pig
Where is the strangest place you spent a Saturday in high school?
Tijuana
What would be your band name?
The Aggravated Sloths
Dave
Concepción
Managing Editor
Stance Internal Staff
