OUR STAFF
Kailee
Amos
What’s your favorite animal?
Goats!
What’s your most irrational fear?
The bridge breaking while I drive across it.
What would be your death row meal?
My Nana’s chicken and noodles with her mashed potatoes.
content editor
What is your most irrational fear?
I am terrified that I will somehow get trench foot. I literally lose sleep over it.
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What is the strangest gift you've ever received?
My younger brother gave me a bottle of motor oil for Christmas one year. He was 6 and I was 8.
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If you had to eat a crayon, what color would you choose?
Crayola's Dandelion Yellow. There's just something so tempting about it.
Cece
Becker
Editor-in-Chief
Jasmine
Bennett
What’s your most irrational fear?
Bathrooms… creepy and gross!
If you were a fictional character, who would you be?
Lord Business from the Lego Movie
If you could eliminate any color, which would you choose and why?
Neon orange, it feels so unnecessary
associate editor
Rachel "Rae"
Berg
What’s your favorite animal?
Cats.
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What’s the weirdest food combination you enjoy?
Oatmeal, peanut butter, and jelly.
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What things most commonly found in your pockets?
Candy wrappers.
design
Abby
Burns
What’s something on your bucket list?
Feed a giraffe! I hear they like cabbage.
What’s your most irrational fear?
I found a cockroach in my loofa once while camping. Horrifying. Life-changing. I’ve used bar soap ever since.
What’s your favorite arbitrary fact?
The dead outnumber the living, we are the minority.
content editor
Delaney
Davis
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DeFord
Cope
What is your favorite arbitrary fact?
Did you know mice have a vertical jump of almost 13 inches? I wish I didn't.
What philosophical concept frustrates you the most?
The notion that language is inherently limiting and the biggest answers can’t be adequately described in words. Something to that effect, at least; I don’t know how to explain.
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What would be your death row meal?
Shellfish. I'm deathly allergic to shellfish. I refuse to give them the satisfaction of executing me on their terms.
associate editor
Delaney
Davis
If you could eliminate any color, which would you choose and why?​
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The color of mustard, because I want that condiment to cease to exist.​
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If you could tell time with any object, what would you chose?
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The sun. I want a good reason to stare at it.​
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What's your most irrational fear?
That rabies is lying dormant in my body.
copyeditor
Connor
Dull
What’s something on your bucket list?
Own and Build Lego Death Star.
What’s your biggest pet peeve?
Q&A’s.
What things are most commonly found in your pockets?
Toy catterpillar.
associate editor
Brian
Hency
If you could tell time with any object what would you choose?
A Magic 8-ball. A little unwieldy, but I think it would be fun to be asked the time and you shake up the 8-ball and show it off. I'd like it to have it's normal functions as well so I could use it as the core decision-making process of my life.
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What's your biggest pet peeve?
Toxicity in games, specifically video games. I believe that video games are an escape from the frustrations of the world around us where we get to explore being someone else completely and by bringing stress along with anger into that and then also lashing out at others just ruins it for everyone involved.
If you had to eat a crayon, what color would you choose?
Silver, especially the 'metallic' version because I could have some fun with it and pretend I had a new found ability to consume metal and it's my favorite color.
content editor
Jason
Holtzman
What’s the strangest gift you’ve ever received?
Fifty frozen one dollar bills — cold hard cash.
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If you were a fictional character, who would you be?
The Globglogabgalab.
If you had to eat a crayon, what color would you choose?
(Dark) Cerulean blue – Blue has been my favorite color and it’s Percy Jackson’s favorite. That’s all the reasoning I need.
associate editor
Lauren
Kallenback
What’s your most irrational fear?
Centipedes just being alive
What is your favorite arbitrary fact?
People's kneecaps don’t become bone until the ages 2-6.
What would be your death row meal?
Alfredo with endless cheese garlic bread
content editor
Eli
Katsimpalis
If you were a fictional character, who would you be?
I would be a random character from regular show, and I would apply to be an intern at the park so I can hang out with Mordecai and Rigby
What would be your death row meal?
Pounds of strawberries, raspberries, cantaloupe, clementines, and maybe a whole box of Boo Berry cereal
What is the weirdest thing you do in your free time?
Recording myself covering some of my favorite songs even though I have 0 musical talent
design
Cassidy
Purvis
If you had to eat a crayon, what color would you choose?
I think I’d have to go with pink, for no other reason besides the fact that the color is pretty.
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If you were a fictional character, who would you be?
Strawberry Shortcake. I always thought she was so cool.
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If you could be a fly on the wall in any room, what room would you be in?
The Yale University library
content editor
Ben
Reister
design
What’s your most irrational fear?
Herobrine from minecraft
What’s the strangest gift you’ve ever received?
A real sword
If you could be a fly on the wall in any room, what room would you be in?
Wherever on earth Genndy Tartakovsky is working at any given moment
Jackson
Smith
What would be your death row meal?
100 piece traditional Mango Habanero and Desert Heat dry rub wings from B-Dubs, half Mango Habanero and half Desert Heat.
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What would your band name be?
“Matching Ties,” and the outfits would be black pants, white button up shirts, and crazy ties that do NOT indeed match. I’d be the lead piano player, once I learn how to play.
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What is your favorite animal?
My favorite animal is an elephant. I love how creative, strong, gentle (unless it’s during mating season), and how emotional they are. They are truly the king of the jungle.
associate editor
Maggie
True
If you could be any fictional character, who would you be?​
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Amy March, I want to marry Theodore Laurence
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What's your biggest pet peeve?
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I am 5ft tall, why do people who are taller than me walk slower than me?!​
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If you could only have three apps on your phone, which ones would you choose?
iMessage, Spotify, and my Notes app
copyeditor
Wesley
Volkert
If you had to eat a crayon, what color would you choose?
Green, I’d think they would taste soapy.
What would your death row meal be?
Pesto.
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If you were a plant what kind of plant would you be?
I think I would be cilantro
content editor
If you could eliminate any color, which would you choose and why?
Magenta, shouldn’t exist
What’s your favorite animal?
The raccoon who washes his cotton candy
If you had your own talk show, who would your first guest be?
An animal mayor
Isaach
Watkins
content editor
If you were a type of plant, what would you be?
Bamboo (I want to be eaten by Pandas)
Favorite fictional character?
Babe, the pig
Where is the strangest place you spent a Saturday in high school?
Tijuana
What would be your band name?
The Aggravated Sloths